Tuesday, June 21, 2005
Investing in the Right Place
As a new member of the Hospice team, it was very disconcerting for me to lose my first patient just 31 hours after admitting her to hospice. I confess that I gasped in surprise and I had to work to control my tears, even though I only had known her for a couple of hours. I could hardly believe it.
I had such a short time to make a difference and only God knows how that turned out. I guess the thing I am grateful for is that I was there and for that moment or two, I loved as much as I could.
So often we invest our energies in places where there is little eternal consequence. I am reminded more now than ever of the power of the present, of the need to invest my time wisely and to listen to that "still small voice" when assessing what activities in which to participate, what to say to whom, and when to do what.
We pay a lot of attention to where we invest our money. Shall we pay less attention to where we invest our time??
Walk in Compassion,
Marti
I had such a short time to make a difference and only God knows how that turned out. I guess the thing I am grateful for is that I was there and for that moment or two, I loved as much as I could.
So often we invest our energies in places where there is little eternal consequence. I am reminded more now than ever of the power of the present, of the need to invest my time wisely and to listen to that "still small voice" when assessing what activities in which to participate, what to say to whom, and when to do what.
We pay a lot of attention to where we invest our money. Shall we pay less attention to where we invest our time??
Walk in Compassion,
Marti
Saturday, June 18, 2005
Humor in the Midst of Suffering
We all handle suffering in different ways. Some of us are stoic, say little, keep a "stiff upper lip," and manage it day by day without much help. Some of us wear our hearts on our sleeve, draw others into our suffering place with words and tears and manage by creating or living in community. There are many ways to manage it.
Yesterday I saw a valiant effort to manage suffering through humor. It drew in community by bringing smiles to those around, at least those willing to be brought into it. Several times a good belly laugh was in order, bringing healing to both the sufferer and to the "audience."
Interestingly enough, sometimes as others draw us into their suffering and we suffer along with them, it conflicts with our own personal style of suffering and we have to choose at that point to either "rejoice with those who rejoice" and "mourn with those that mourn" or trot off on our own personal suffering program.
What choices will I make?? How about you?
In the meantime...
Walk in Compassion,
Marti
Yesterday I saw a valiant effort to manage suffering through humor. It drew in community by bringing smiles to those around, at least those willing to be brought into it. Several times a good belly laugh was in order, bringing healing to both the sufferer and to the "audience."
Interestingly enough, sometimes as others draw us into their suffering and we suffer along with them, it conflicts with our own personal style of suffering and we have to choose at that point to either "rejoice with those who rejoice" and "mourn with those that mourn" or trot off on our own personal suffering program.
What choices will I make?? How about you?
In the meantime...
Walk in Compassion,
Marti
Thursday, June 16, 2005
God is an Economist
Yesterday, I had a personal lesson in the economy of God. He uses everything and wastes nothing. Just when one thinks that it is obvious where He is going, a generous and delightful surprise appears.
I have befriended a precious senior who is struggling with clinical depression. She has few resources and fewer friends. For about two months, I have continued to forge a new friendship based on, for me, an internal agreement to hang in there, no matter what, convinced that God has called me to this level of commitment. This is not a one-sided relationship. She is a delightful person, and she doesn't even know it. She is a fascinating conversationalist, very intelligent, and a brilliant writer.
Last night, I spoke with someone else that is also caring for her, someone previously unknown to me. In the ensuing conversation, we both discovered that there is something common between the two of us that likely would not have been known if we hadn't both been drawn by God to the same person. We don't travel in the same circles and would perhaps not ever have even met.
In what way is God "making the most" of opportunities in your life?? Delight in watching Him work. In the meantime...
Walk in Compassion,
Marti
I have befriended a precious senior who is struggling with clinical depression. She has few resources and fewer friends. For about two months, I have continued to forge a new friendship based on, for me, an internal agreement to hang in there, no matter what, convinced that God has called me to this level of commitment. This is not a one-sided relationship. She is a delightful person, and she doesn't even know it. She is a fascinating conversationalist, very intelligent, and a brilliant writer.
Last night, I spoke with someone else that is also caring for her, someone previously unknown to me. In the ensuing conversation, we both discovered that there is something common between the two of us that likely would not have been known if we hadn't both been drawn by God to the same person. We don't travel in the same circles and would perhaps not ever have even met.
In what way is God "making the most" of opportunities in your life?? Delight in watching Him work. In the meantime...
Walk in Compassion,
Marti
Tuesday, June 14, 2005
The Listener
I started reading a small book called The Listener, by Terri Blackstock. The premise is that a man, following a disturbing dream, suddenly finds himself able to "hear" the desperate thoughts of the people around him. Now admittedly, I am only a few chapters into this tiny tome, but I find the concept incredibly appealing.
What if God genuinely wants to show us the hearts of those around us and we don't listen, because we either are afraid or we don't want the responsibility of having to do something about it...or both? What if, as part of loving God with our heart, mind, soul and strength and loving our neighbor as ourself we are supposed to "tune in" to the needs and hurts of our neighbor? To be willing to know and engage them as we know ourselves? What if we were really designed more for relationship than we want to admit and part of being the Church is to be willing to be vulnerable enough to listen to God and then be willing to contend in relationship with both the person and the issues presented?
Whew. I really want to think about this some more. And pray. And listen. What about you? Does this concept interest you?
For now...
Walk in Compassion,
Marti
What if God genuinely wants to show us the hearts of those around us and we don't listen, because we either are afraid or we don't want the responsibility of having to do something about it...or both? What if, as part of loving God with our heart, mind, soul and strength and loving our neighbor as ourself we are supposed to "tune in" to the needs and hurts of our neighbor? To be willing to know and engage them as we know ourselves? What if we were really designed more for relationship than we want to admit and part of being the Church is to be willing to be vulnerable enough to listen to God and then be willing to contend in relationship with both the person and the issues presented?
Whew. I really want to think about this some more. And pray. And listen. What about you? Does this concept interest you?
For now...
Walk in Compassion,
Marti
Monday, June 13, 2005
Alive with Newness
Today was the first day of my new job and I am amazed at how engaged and connected I was with this position from the very beginning moments.
Several hours were spent in training, although I attended one meeting where the staff filled each other in on the events of the weekend. I could see why Odyssey has such a great reputation for service. All the people who had been on call seemed to genuinely care about the patients and their concerns and I could see lots of "going above and beyond the call of duty." It really made me excited about working there.
My prayer is that every day, when I leave work, I will know that somehow I made a difference.
How about you?? What do you want God to do in you at work each day??
In the meantime...
Walk in Compassion,
Marti
Several hours were spent in training, although I attended one meeting where the staff filled each other in on the events of the weekend. I could see why Odyssey has such a great reputation for service. All the people who had been on call seemed to genuinely care about the patients and their concerns and I could see lots of "going above and beyond the call of duty." It really made me excited about working there.
My prayer is that every day, when I leave work, I will know that somehow I made a difference.
How about you?? What do you want God to do in you at work each day??
In the meantime...
Walk in Compassion,
Marti
Saturday, June 11, 2005
The Last of Your Freedoms
Victor Frankl, survivor of Auschwitz and renowned author of “Man’s Search for Meaning,”said the following:
“We who lived in the concentration camps can remember the men who walked through the huts comforting others, giving away their last piece of bread. They may have been few in number, but they offer sufficient proof that everything can be taken from man but one thing; the last of his freedoms – to choose one’s attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one’s way.”
No matter what our circumstances, how our heart aches, the angst we may feel about our children and their choices, we have the privilege of choosing how we will think and behave, or how as Frankl would put it, our attitude about our circumstances.
John Maxwell, in his book “The Winning Attitude: Your Key to Personal Success,” talks about the instrumentation on a plane. We are all familiar with the altitude monitor but very few of us are familiar with the Attitude instrument. The Attitude measures the nose of the plane with respect to the horizon. “Nose up” and the plane will head up with respect to the horizon. “Nose down” and the plane will head down toward the ground.
If we apply this to our own lives, a nose up attitude and we soar! A Nose down attitude and we are headed for an accident...Is your attitude nose up or nose down today? You get to choose.
Walk in Compassion,
Marti
“We who lived in the concentration camps can remember the men who walked through the huts comforting others, giving away their last piece of bread. They may have been few in number, but they offer sufficient proof that everything can be taken from man but one thing; the last of his freedoms – to choose one’s attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one’s way.”
No matter what our circumstances, how our heart aches, the angst we may feel about our children and their choices, we have the privilege of choosing how we will think and behave, or how as Frankl would put it, our attitude about our circumstances.
John Maxwell, in his book “The Winning Attitude: Your Key to Personal Success,” talks about the instrumentation on a plane. We are all familiar with the altitude monitor but very few of us are familiar with the Attitude instrument. The Attitude measures the nose of the plane with respect to the horizon. “Nose up” and the plane will head up with respect to the horizon. “Nose down” and the plane will head down toward the ground.
If we apply this to our own lives, a nose up attitude and we soar! A Nose down attitude and we are headed for an accident...Is your attitude nose up or nose down today? You get to choose.
Walk in Compassion,
Marti
Friday, June 10, 2005
Spiritual Autoimmune Disorder (SAD)
The last two days I drove a lot as I took Blueberry, our Old English Sheepdog, to CSU’s Veterinary Teaching Hospital in Fort Collins. It was fairly grueling since each of four 122 mile one-way trips was routed through Denver traffic.
Poor Blueberry, she was supposed to be there for surgery to remove a recurrence of a cancerous tumor, but in her lab tests they learned that her platelet count is abnormally low, making surgery unsafe (Blueberry’s platelet count 8,000, normal is at least 150,000). Ultimately, we learned that she has a condition where she creates platelets but her body destroys them somehow.
I began thinking about this in the context of my relationship with God. I wonder how often God blesses me with something that I end up either intentionally or unintentionally hurting, harming or destroying. How many times has He entrusted me with a relationship that I did not nurture, a physical blessing over which I exercised poor stewardship, or a talent that I did not use and thus allowed to diminish??
I pray that God will bless me with the eyes to see His blessings, the wisdom to know what to do with them and the courage to act on the wisdom He gives.
How about you??
Walk in Compassion,
Marti
Poor Blueberry, she was supposed to be there for surgery to remove a recurrence of a cancerous tumor, but in her lab tests they learned that her platelet count is abnormally low, making surgery unsafe (Blueberry’s platelet count 8,000, normal is at least 150,000). Ultimately, we learned that she has a condition where she creates platelets but her body destroys them somehow.
I began thinking about this in the context of my relationship with God. I wonder how often God blesses me with something that I end up either intentionally or unintentionally hurting, harming or destroying. How many times has He entrusted me with a relationship that I did not nurture, a physical blessing over which I exercised poor stewardship, or a talent that I did not use and thus allowed to diminish??
I pray that God will bless me with the eyes to see His blessings, the wisdom to know what to do with them and the courage to act on the wisdom He gives.
How about you??
Walk in Compassion,
Marti
Thursday, June 09, 2005
A Place of Refuge and Rest
Sanctuary is defined in several ways; one of which is a place of refuge and rest. As I thought about sanctuary this morning, I thought about how often we desperately need one and how often one seems hard to find.
I studied it a bit in the scripture and I discovered many places where God commanded His people to build His Sanctuary (place of refuge and rest). Exodus 25:8 says, " And let them make me a sanctuary, that I may dwell in their midst." What if, in this culture of busyness, God wants us to fashion ourselves a place where we and He might dwell as a refuge?
Do you have a place of refuge in your home? A place where you can study, be silent, or be at peace in His presence? I confess that I really don't have such a place and I am challenged this morning to partner with Him to make one.
In Psalm 96:6 it says, "Honor and majesty are before Him, strength and beauty are in His sanctuary." As we honor Him by creating a place of sanctuary, we will find strength and beauty.
Where is your Sanctuary?? As you prepare your heart for Him...
Walk in Compassion,
Marti
I studied it a bit in the scripture and I discovered many places where God commanded His people to build His Sanctuary (place of refuge and rest). Exodus 25:8 says, " And let them make me a sanctuary, that I may dwell in their midst." What if, in this culture of busyness, God wants us to fashion ourselves a place where we and He might dwell as a refuge?
Do you have a place of refuge in your home? A place where you can study, be silent, or be at peace in His presence? I confess that I really don't have such a place and I am challenged this morning to partner with Him to make one.
In Psalm 96:6 it says, "Honor and majesty are before Him, strength and beauty are in His sanctuary." As we honor Him by creating a place of sanctuary, we will find strength and beauty.
Where is your Sanctuary?? As you prepare your heart for Him...
Walk in Compassion,
Marti
Wednesday, June 08, 2005
Providential Rest
Last night God gave me a great and unexpected, very serendipitous gift.
Generally, on Tuesday nights, Dan and I enjoy being with our Drama group where we are studying Rory Noland's book, "Thriving as an Artist in the Church." We also participate in great exercises to expand our gift and to practice our craft; such as improvisation, mirroring, writing, and a number of others. It is great fun and also touches me deeply as we walk in community with the other members of the team.
Yesterday, our Director cancelled our meeting due to some scheduling issues. While I was initially disappointed, I quickly remembered what God is teaching me about rest and what I'll be writing in my book (working title: A Spiritual Spa: How our Culture Robs Us of the Rest we Need and What to Do About it). When God providentially opens up a space in my schedule, I need to prayerfully consider what to do about it.
It turned out to be a very restful and pleasant evening. Dan and I took a very leisurely walk with the dogs, Blueberry and Raspberry, the unwitting and delighted co-recipients of God's gracious providence. Then we had a relaxing dinner and spent the rest of the evening finishing up watching the DVD "Ray" about the life of Ray Charles.
At the end of the evening, I felt so relaxed and at ease. I didn't try to fill in the gaps with more work, more people, more ministry, but rather took the time and allowed God to bless us with some peaceful moments together.
As God providentially opens up places of rest for you, take them and enjoy them. In the meantime...
Walk in Compassion,
Marti
Generally, on Tuesday nights, Dan and I enjoy being with our Drama group where we are studying Rory Noland's book, "Thriving as an Artist in the Church." We also participate in great exercises to expand our gift and to practice our craft; such as improvisation, mirroring, writing, and a number of others. It is great fun and also touches me deeply as we walk in community with the other members of the team.
Yesterday, our Director cancelled our meeting due to some scheduling issues. While I was initially disappointed, I quickly remembered what God is teaching me about rest and what I'll be writing in my book (working title: A Spiritual Spa: How our Culture Robs Us of the Rest we Need and What to Do About it). When God providentially opens up a space in my schedule, I need to prayerfully consider what to do about it.
It turned out to be a very restful and pleasant evening. Dan and I took a very leisurely walk with the dogs, Blueberry and Raspberry, the unwitting and delighted co-recipients of God's gracious providence. Then we had a relaxing dinner and spent the rest of the evening finishing up watching the DVD "Ray" about the life of Ray Charles.
At the end of the evening, I felt so relaxed and at ease. I didn't try to fill in the gaps with more work, more people, more ministry, but rather took the time and allowed God to bless us with some peaceful moments together.
As God providentially opens up places of rest for you, take them and enjoy them. In the meantime...
Walk in Compassion,
Marti
Tuesday, June 07, 2005
A True Friend
I read this quote from Henri Nouwen from his book, Out of Solitude (1974) and it really resonated with me.
"When we honestly ask ourselves which persons in our lives mean the most to us, we often find that it is those who, instead of giving much advice, solutions, or cures, have chosen rather to share our pain and touch our wounds with a gentle and tender hand. The friend who can be silent with us in a moment of despair or confusion, who can stay with us in a hour of grief and bereavement, who can tolerate not-knowing, not-curing, and not-healing and face with us the reality of our powerlessness, that is the friend who cares."
In our culture, it is so natural to give advice, to try to fix or rescue, that in our efforts to be a friend we often fail to do the thing that means the most...that is, to stand with each other, facing the day-to-day pain of our lives.
There is power in facing our pain head on and it is the only relief from the powerlessness we feel in all the areas of woundedness in our lives. A true friend walks with us in that journey, supporting us in our efforts not to stuff our pain down, ignore our discomfort, blame others for it. While it is so hard to go against the flow of our culture, to be willing to hurt; the freedom that is released in our commitment to facing our pain will in the long run bring joy.
As you face your pain today...
Walk in Compassion,
Marti
"When we honestly ask ourselves which persons in our lives mean the most to us, we often find that it is those who, instead of giving much advice, solutions, or cures, have chosen rather to share our pain and touch our wounds with a gentle and tender hand. The friend who can be silent with us in a moment of despair or confusion, who can stay with us in a hour of grief and bereavement, who can tolerate not-knowing, not-curing, and not-healing and face with us the reality of our powerlessness, that is the friend who cares."
In our culture, it is so natural to give advice, to try to fix or rescue, that in our efforts to be a friend we often fail to do the thing that means the most...that is, to stand with each other, facing the day-to-day pain of our lives.
There is power in facing our pain head on and it is the only relief from the powerlessness we feel in all the areas of woundedness in our lives. A true friend walks with us in that journey, supporting us in our efforts not to stuff our pain down, ignore our discomfort, blame others for it. While it is so hard to go against the flow of our culture, to be willing to hurt; the freedom that is released in our commitment to facing our pain will in the long run bring joy.
As you face your pain today...
Walk in Compassion,
Marti
Monday, June 06, 2005
A New Job!
I am pleased and excited to announce that as of next Monday, June 13, I will be an employee of Odyssey Healthcare, Inc., a hospice provider. See www.odyssey-healthcare.com. My job will be that of Community Education Representative, meaning that I will work in the medical community to educate healthcare providers about hospice, about Odyssey, and make myself available as a resource to patients and their families as they make end-of-life decisions.
In 2001, our family selected Odyssey to be the hospice provider when my grandmother was in a position to be"kicked out" of the hospital since she wasn't improving and was given a terminal diagnosis. Long story short, she wasn't allowed by my uncle to go home to die, so she had to get a nursing home room. Medicare pays for hospice (not the room, mind you) and we knew she would need extra help. The hospital's preferred provider was Odyssey. At the time, I remember being so amazed at the response time of the social worker that came to do our paperwork at the hospital and I continued to be amazed every time we had a need. They were always there, seemingly almost before I knew we had a need.
Now I know from having learned Odyssey's Standards of Care that the reason they were so excellent is because every one of Odyssey's employees knows the 14 Standards of Care and those standards are used with every call, every page, every need. I am so thrilled to have an opportunity to work with a company that is so committed to excellence and passionate about patients, their families and their needs. I can''t wait to start.
I realize that it is going to be difficult to give patients bad news and to help them process their bad news with their families. I also know that I won't be in it alone. Not only will I have every patient covered in prayer personally, but I have committments from friends who will be praying each time they know I am with a patient. Of course, my friends won't know who the patient is...but God does.
I'll keep you posted. In the meantime...
Walk in Compassion,
Marti
I am pleased and excited to announce that as of next Monday, June 13, I will be an employee of Odyssey Healthcare, Inc., a hospice provider. See www.odyssey-healthcare.com. My job will be that of Community Education Representative, meaning that I will work in the medical community to educate healthcare providers about hospice, about Odyssey, and make myself available as a resource to patients and their families as they make end-of-life decisions.
In 2001, our family selected Odyssey to be the hospice provider when my grandmother was in a position to be"kicked out" of the hospital since she wasn't improving and was given a terminal diagnosis. Long story short, she wasn't allowed by my uncle to go home to die, so she had to get a nursing home room. Medicare pays for hospice (not the room, mind you) and we knew she would need extra help. The hospital's preferred provider was Odyssey. At the time, I remember being so amazed at the response time of the social worker that came to do our paperwork at the hospital and I continued to be amazed every time we had a need. They were always there, seemingly almost before I knew we had a need.
Now I know from having learned Odyssey's Standards of Care that the reason they were so excellent is because every one of Odyssey's employees knows the 14 Standards of Care and those standards are used with every call, every page, every need. I am so thrilled to have an opportunity to work with a company that is so committed to excellence and passionate about patients, their families and their needs. I can''t wait to start.
I realize that it is going to be difficult to give patients bad news and to help them process their bad news with their families. I also know that I won't be in it alone. Not only will I have every patient covered in prayer personally, but I have committments from friends who will be praying each time they know I am with a patient. Of course, my friends won't know who the patient is...but God does.
I'll keep you posted. In the meantime...
Walk in Compassion,
Marti
